[2024 Year in Review] Realistically flawed relationships

[2024 Year in Review] Realistically flawed relationships

by Dramaddictally

2024 was one in all my hardest years in a very long time. It was a 12 months of private losses and disruptions to routine, the place I discovered myself scattered throughout nations (and generally couches), struggling for a strong grip. The largest loss I sustained, the one which threw my day-to-day life right into a shambles, was the breakup of a decade-long relationship in December of final 12 months. Following that, 2024 changed into a prolonged transition — into new properties, new jobs, new possessions, and new social circles, but in addition a glance again on the previous, and all of my prior relationships. It turned a reckoning about how I received right here, who I’m, and what it may all probably imply. And, as keenly conscious of it as I used to be, it was a reckoning that I confronted very a lot by myself.

Okay-dramas are often my go-to supply of downside fixing. I look to them for consolation, care, and to be a quiet pal that may sit with me by means of the night time once I want it. However one thing shifted in me this 12 months. I had hassle reaching out. I remoted and requested to be alone. I lower myself off from sure helps (together with the DB group, a lot to my remorse). And I couldn’t stand to see anybody profitable in love.

Fortunately sufficient, in 2024 greater than ever, dramaland turned out a bunch of “failures.” It was stuffed with breakups and divorces. {Couples} that attempted onerous — and beloved deep — however simply couldn’t make it proper. It had escalating rifts, long-term boredom, and arguments that mirrored a actuality I may relate to. And whereas I admit my eye was extra attuned to it, these storylines appeared like a far cry from the pitch-perfect issues or multi-lifetime love struggles that Okay-dramas typically give us.

I do know that in moments once I really feel most alone, escapism just isn’t the reply. I must see myself mirrored, and to keep in mind that everybody goes by means of robust occasions. This 12 months, I wanted to see that breakups occur. Fights recur. Individuals divorce. And the tales we inform about it will not be solely charming and worthy, however the ones that join us — proper now, and as we transfer forward into the following chapter (or episode) of our lives.

To rejoice my 12 months in dramas, the reveals on this listing mark those that received me by means of a couple of darkish nights. They pulled me up and out of a fog — even when just for a second — to ponder love, relationships, coupledom, and what it means to be a accomplice. And whereas these realistically flawed relationships might not deliver solace to everybody going by means of an analogous scenario, I hope you will discover somewhat spark to maneuver you out of the chaos and into a way of completion.

*Spoilers forward*

Inform Me That You Love Me

My favourite story this 12 months about variations between companions, and the way love doesn’t conquer all, is that this little gem of a drama. It’s quiet, understated, and highly effective because it reveals how affection grows (slowly and with intention) after which reveals the delicate friction that happens when two individuals are making an attempt too onerous to achieve one another. On this case, we’ve a deaf character, who communicates by means of signing, writing, and making artwork, and a listening to character, who throws herself into studying signal language as a way to join with him.

These two develop a lovely love, every making an attempt to fulfill the opposite midway. They’re each keen to study, to just accept their variations, and to be susceptible — nevertheless it doesn’t save the connection. The tragedy right here is that when it comes proper right down to it, the breakup is a call (made by one character) about how they need to reside their life. What looks as if a small barrier between them (or could be small for one more couple) causes a big inner battle. At base, it’s about inclinations, character, and worldview — all issues get in the way in which of those two simply making an attempt to like one another.

Nonetheless, it’s a hopeful drama. We all know within the introduction that the connection gained’t final and this can be a story about how issues don’t at all times work out the way in which we would like. There’s numerous harm right here. However by means of the method, we’re additionally left with gratitude, development, and wholesome grieving. I associated to this drama fairly a bit — and it showcased the correct of heartbreak to appease my battered coronary heart.

LTNS

When it comes to execution, I’m nonetheless on the fence about this drama general. It’s not a present for everybody (with lewd depictions of intercourse on the fore). However the marriage at its heart struck a nerve with me, a couple of couple who has succumbed to the mundane particulars of their each day grind and is desperately looking for life once more. The title stands for “Lengthy Time No Intercourse” and the six-episode story reveals us how this married duo received to the place they’re — and the loopy issues they do to attempt to get away of it.

It is a comedy-action drama with an outlandish premise about monitoring down dishonest spouses and blackmailing them for cash earlier than their companions discover out. But it surely’s actually about two individuals whose strategies are a lot nearer to dwelling as they attempt to keep their identities inside their marriage. We see ferocious fights, wordless walkouts, and rounds of bodily and emotional infidelity. However by means of all of it, these two nonetheless like and love one another. They need it may work out between them; they only can’t appear to determine easy methods to do it.

It’s one of many solely dramas I do know of which takes us by means of a sensible divorce, the place the couple doesn’t hate one another, cries as they finish it, expresses thanks to at least one one other for all they’ve been by means of collectively — after which goes forward with the termination anyway. However the drama takes it a step additional (type of as a joke, but in addition as a nod to the messiness of actuality), and has them lastly discover that intercourse they’ve been lacking as soon as the divorce is last.

What Comes After Love

That is only a lovely story, instructed in a beautiful gentle, with extremely likable characters. And it additionally portrays a painfully ugly breakup. I’m no stranger to cultural quandaries in love, and this story felt a bit like watching my very own life unravel. Our feminine lead is Korean, dwelling in Japan, and her boyfriend is Japanese, and thus, completely at dwelling within the tradition they reside in. After we meet them, it’s 5 years post-breakup and the story is a dive into what precisely occurred to get them from blissful to heartbroken.

Watching the leads fall in love is beautiful. The chemistry between them is off the charts. And after we lastly see how the whole lot melted round them, it’s all of the extra uncomfortable to witness. Our Korean character is lonely and remoted in her adopted nation and, strive as she may, she will’t get by means of to her Japanese accomplice that having solely him to depend on just isn’t sufficient. She has no household, few pals, and no deep roots in Japan as a result of she moved there as an grownup. She speaks excellent Japanese, has a job, and does the whole lot she will to combine — however there’s no substitute for having a whole-life historical past in a spot.

When the ultimate breakup comes, it pivots on a disastrous argument the place the feminine lead screams out all of the issues she will’t talk to the person she loves — and he or she does it in Korean, which he can’t perceive. This second shook me in a manner that I’m not used to with Okay-dramas for its depiction of what occurs once you actually can’t break by means of cultural boundaries, regardless of how onerous you strive or how a lot you’re keen on the opposite individual. It hurts to really feel that walled off. And the heroine right here expresses that harm phenomenally.

Mr. Plankton

All proper, now we’re venturing into extra summary territory. First, I’ll say, no, I’ve by no means been kidnapped by an ex and brought on a wild goose chase across the nation. However boy do I relate to the way in which the leads on this drama set off the hell out of one another. Abandonment points, lack of belonging, concern of repeating generational traumas — all of the issues these two have in frequent (that make them head over heels in love with one another) are the issues that additionally rip them aside. (Ugh, core wounds are the worst.)

What I discovered totally different about Mr. Plankton than numerous the standard-issue tales with childhood trauma is that the protagonists right here had a three-year relationship, broke up, and tried to maneuver on with different individuals that actually, actually might have been higher matches for them. Within the case of the feminine lead, she understands how psychologically screwed up her ex is and he or she will get engaged to somebody who places her first and can by no means abandon her. It’s what she must really feel secure. And the male lead, whereas he principally flits round, additionally has a life-long pal and confidant who’s in love with him and cares for him in a manner that his ex-girlfriend can’t.

Circumstances being what they’re, nonetheless, our two leads discover themselves in one another’s orbit once more, having the identical fights, feeling the identical love (poisonous as it’s), and desirous to do it yet again, even when it’s tough. This isn’t a pair that works issues out and learns to be excellent companions for one another. As a substitute, they only determine that the thrill is well worth the ache. Yep, it sounds unhealthy — however generally, such is life. And I appreciated the pliability to permit these characters to be who they’re (like ‘em or not).

The Midnight Romance in Hagwon

Of all of the reveals on this listing, that is essentially the most quintessentially Okay-drama-esque. All in all, it doesn’t depict a very sensible and flawed relationship. Nevertheless, it has the most effective and most real-feeling struggle scenes of all time. That is partially a office drama and technically a noona romance, however the relationship and workplace issues overlap as a result of the pair works collectively (and is in fact hiding their love from all of their colleagues).

The noona in query can also be the boss (and former trainer) of the male lead. Each have sturdy opinions about easy methods to deal with difficulties at work, and when one particular problem involves a head, these two lock horns in a drawn-out, severely awkward to observe, argument. There’s screaming, sarcasm, contorted faces, bugged eyes, exasperation, and arms transferring wildly. The scene drags on and on whereas the digital camera stays brutally unwavering. Sure, it’s a struggle about variations of opinion at work. However there isn’t any manner it could have gotten this heated if these two weren’t within the throes of a brand new relationship the place there’s already an influence battle.

Since this drama falls right into a format we’re used to, they take a while aside to consider how they behaved and wind up a unified entrance. However that slice-of-life motion scene is one which has caught with me as a core piece of their painful relationship story. And if there’s something these dramas taught me this 12 months, it’s that whereas heartbreak occurs and harm is an imminent a part of life, if we didn’t undergo it, we’d be giving up our biggest tales.

 
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